4/12, circa 6:00 a.m.
(scene: watching kids run around on airport play yard, chitchattin' "so where ya goin', blahblahblahbalah")
Airport Woman: "I just found out my husband of 15 years is having an affair."
Me: "Oh Shit, I'm so, so sorry."
(Do I have a "Talk to me, I totally get your shit" neon sign on my forehead?!)
4/12, post Philly-to-Chicago leg, listening to "Doors Closing" announcement on 8-hour Chicago-Honolulu leg
Me: Do you have the DVD player?
Mr. ABF: I thought you had the DVD player.
4/12, 40 minutes into flight
Me: Can I hold him for you?
(Aisle-mate was a woman flying alone with a six-month old; woman developed a nose-bleed on ascent. And this is how I came to hold my first baby since Maddy. It didn't crush me. It wasn't nirvana, either.)
4/14, circa 8:00 a.m.
Me: What are they doing?
Mr. ABF: Oh, it's Tuesday. They're renewing their vows on the beach.
Me: (avec dripping sarcasm) Do you want to renew our vows?
Mr. ABF: No, but I'll buy you a beer.
4/14, 5:00 a.m.
Bella: My ear hurts.
(9:30 a.m.) Bella: My ear hurts.
(1:30, feverish, whining) Bella: My ear hurts.
(Found local clinic, massive ear infection. Smoothies and tv in the hotel.)
4/16, circa 9:00 a.m.
Bella: They're going to take a picture of our family, dad. Of everyone in our family. Of everyone in our family who is alive.
4/17, circa 2:30 p.m. (Bella has just made friends with the five-year-old girl whose family is camped out next to ours on the beach. They're going through general family introductions with each other.)
Bella: I have a sister, but she died.
Beach Girl: YOUR SISTER DIED??!!
Bella: Yes. Her name was Maddalena.
Beach Girl: Who killed her?
4/19, 5:00 a.m. (Both cell phones have just gone ringing and beeping)
Me: What's up?
My Brother: Dad had a heart attack.
(Turns out a rather bad one, but caught in a most-timely fashion. Still in hospital, but out of ICU, and recovery looks good.)
4/20, 11:00 a.m. Philly time
Mr. ABF: So you think you'll deliver our luggage to our house this afternoon?
I so need a vacation, yo. Mahalo!