Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Honey, I Shrunk Children's!

For some reason, Bella's school decided to extend Spring Break by two days (?), so yesterday we ambled off to check out the Please Touch Museum in their new digs. This is an amazing, amazing children's museum, made all the more amazing by their new abode: a left over structure from the 1876 centennial exhibition in Philadelphia. If you've read Devil in the White City, you know that such fair structures from this era are massive in scale (one wing is devoted to a "make your own flying machine" where you assemble a foam creation and then self propel it up three flights before letting it drop and seeing how long it stays airborne); incredibly architecturally detailed on the outside; probably thrown up in about 60 days with water, flour, and scrap lumber; and incredibly fire-prone. Perfect spot for a Children's museum.

We made our way through the automobiles, the space portion, music, beautifully restored carousel, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, and finally -- the piece d'resistance -- the kid's sized mini city. Dump truck! TV studio! Shoe Store! And hey, woah, what's that on the left?



Ohmygoodlord, it's MiniChildren's! So kids can make believe kids need their own hospitals! Cuz you can't make that shit up! But wait, walk inside and you're dumped right into . . .



THE NICU! Bwahahahahaha! Lookit all the lifeless, plastic-complexioned babies staring vacantly into space! The recreation is uncanny. The lighting is dead on, and it looks about that comfortable for parents to spend the night.

"I think it's supposed to be a maternity ward," said Mr. ABF through my peels of laughter, but definitely sporting a smug smile when I retorted, "I am so blogging this."

Bella gave the babies a quick once over from the door, and headed off to see some xrays on the far wall. I was wondering if there was going to be some kid's-museum-inappropriate reaction from her (given MY reaction was quite mature, and thank goodness, it was pretty empty in the afternoon so I don't think anyone heard my conversationally-volumed, "Oh for Fuck's Sake"), when she spied . . . .

Kid's bakery, right next store. Crisis averted, and a girl after my own heart. We got the hell out of dodge, and spent the rest of the afternoon in the kid's grocery filling our cart with imaginary carbohydrates and corn-syrup-laced goodness.

22 comments:

CLC said...

oy vey. WTF? i don't know what else to say.

holly said...

WTF! Maybe we can "practice" this week. In preperation for next week.

Why not through in a play Infertility Clinic? Those dildo cams would make great toys.

Michele said...

Okay, I have to agree. WTF. CHOP was great to us when we were there with Nicholas, and the Hosp of the Univ of PA was wonderful, too, with both Nick and Sophie. But seriously... I think I wouldnt have been able to contain my "WTF" if I'd seen this.

ak_sapphire said...

"Oh for Fuck's Sake" pretty much covers it. kate and her 8 recently aired an episode of them visiting the same museum. of course, kate didn't keep her voice to a normal conversation-volume.

Beautiful Mess said...

OH..MY...WHOA..WTF?! WOW, I think "Oh For Fuck's Sake" sums it up nicely.

Bluebird said...

Oh my gosh!! I was shocked and appaled as I was reading. . . until I reached the part about your comment - then I started laughing out loud because those are EXACTLY the words that would have come out of my mouth! Scheeze.

niobe said...

Um....rendered just about speechless here.

ezra'smommy said...

i don't think i would have handled this in stride the way you did. makes think twice about that plan i had of taking my niece & nephew there soon.

angie said...

For fuck's sake, indeed! I am actually so glad you blogged about this, because well, i was thinking about taking bea next week for her birthday. Cripes. I would have been a heaping ball of incoherent mush if I walked into that section.

So thanks for posting the big yellow sign in front of the the PTM saying, "Warning, seemingly dead babies ahead. Babylost mamas, skip da shit."

loribeth said...

Are you serious???

So glad there were some sweet diversions for you at the end. : )

k@lakly said...

What no mortuary and cemetary?

Jesus H.

Aunt Becky said...

W.T.F? That's unreal.

missing_one said...

Ya'll are weird out there! LOL

G$ said...

That's just creepy.

caitsmom said...

Oh, Scheeeeezzzzz...... But you made me laugh! Ditto the "oh for Fs sake."

Lisa b said...

Whoa. I'm getting a little queasy just looking at the photos and that wasn't even my NICU.

janis said...

I'm totally freaked out sick. I need an ice-cold beer or a gin-tonic, quick.

luna said...

for fuck's sake is right. wtf is all I got. geez.

charmedgirl said...

i'm pretty sure it was the maternity ward...but how could it ever be in our fucked brains? on second thought, is there a normal maternity ward in children's hosp, or are babies only transferred there? jesus. wtf? you really do just have to laugh at how things have changed for all of us, although it is kinda a superpower, especially in the ability to predict the backstory of any truly conscience-less character in any movie or tv show...

Catherine W said...

Just plain wrong. On so many levels.

Dalene said...

Yikes. Completely unbelievable.

Azaera said...

Wow. Just wow.